Recently I was part of an interesting game: participants were given cards with certain situations as well as potential reactions and actions. You were supposed to choose what fits you better from the options. Sometimes options did not make much sense, but it is a game. Then everyone was presenting their choices with explanation and motivation description. And other participants were supposed to give “+” or “-“ for this to you. The number of +&- was limited so every round you had to give a mix of reactions, by the rules of the game.
This was a great illustration in a safe environment on how we make judgements: this can be our relation to the situation, to the number of “+” that someone had left, to the state of mind someone was in, and very rarely really related to the person that was presenting the situation.
Very similar thing happens in life: our reaction is way more about us then about another person that is in the centre of the judgement. Their actions might trigger something in us that causes emotional reaction, or we might like or dislike how we feel next to them. And we can control that part! We can observe how our or someone’s actions impact people around, make mental notes and adjustments but at the end we can only control our own reactions. And understanding how this process works potentially can help become less upset with someone’s behaviour as it is more about them :)
What do you think?
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